What makes a real engineer? The ideal engineer is a composite... He is not a scientist, he is not a mathematician, he is not a socialogist, he is not a writer but he may use the knowledge and techniques of any or all of these disciplines in solving engineering problems - NE Dougherty.

Once a girl and a boy were eating burgers. The boy said to the girl “I need to tell you something!" The girl said “Don't talk to me while I'm eating, when I finish my burger then you can talk."

So when they'd finished eating the girl asked the boy “ Now what did you want to say?" The boy said “um, I was going to say that there was a cockroach in your burger!"
------------------------------------------------------
Q: What did the spider do on the computer?
A: Made a website!
------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why was the computer cold?
A: It left it's Windows open!
------------------------------------------------------
Q: Maths teacher asks a boy what are 2,4,10,17.
A: The boy replies they are Zee TV, NDTV, Sab TV and Cartoon Network.
------------------------------------------------------
My grandmother moved in with our family of five. As I was brushing my teeth one morning, she tapped on the door. “Is anyone in there?" she called.
I mumbled an answer, to which she replied, “Is that a yes or a no?"
------------------------------------------------------
Q: What did one flag say to the other flag?
A: Nothing. It just waved!
------------------------------------------------------
Q: What gets wetter the more it dries?
A: A towel
------------------------------------------------------
Question: If you catch it, you will throw it away. If you don't catch it, you will keep it. What is it?
Answer: Lice
------------------------------------------------------
Dad's writes on son's Facebook wall:
“Dear Son, How are you? All are fine here. We miss you a lot. Please!! TURN OFF THE COMPUTER & COME DOWN FOR DINNER!!!
------------------------------------------------------

Lady 1: My son is very well behaved.
Lady 2: How can you say that? Wasn't he arrested and imprisoned for 5 years.
Lady 1: Yes, but he got out after 2 years for good behavior inside the jail.
----------------------------------------------------
Doctor to a rich man: Do you prefer a local anesthesia?
Rich man: I would rather prefer an imported one.
----------------------------------------------------
There were two brothers at aged 12 & 8. They were so naughty that people always came with complaints to their parents. Parents became very fed-up and they took them to a psychologist.

Doctor firstly called the elder son and asked him “Tell me where is God?” The boy remained in silence. Then, doctor again with loud voice asked him “Tell me where is God?”.

The boy suddenly ran away and went to his home and hide himself in his cloth cupboard.

When his brother saw that he also ran away after him and reached home and asked “Brother, what did the doctor ask you; and why did you ran away?”

The elder brother said, “God is missing and everybody thinking that we did it”
----------------------------------------------------
Ever wondered, what is the meaning of our Indian Greeting - Namaste? Word Namaste means divine in me bows to the divine in you.
----------------------------------------------------
Politics is not a profession
but a passion to serve one's nation,
The politician is not a ruler
but a humble servant of citizens,
A politician without patriotism,
is like a minister without any portfolio.
- Swami Srikantananda
----------------------------------------------------
Religion is not for the weak,
for they try to compromise;
Religion is not for the coward,
for they try to escape;
Religion is not for the hypocrite,
for they try to hide;
Religion is not for the timid,
for they are always afraid;
Religion is not for the mean,
for they always try to degrade;
Religion is not for fanatics,
for they always try to destroy;
Religion is not for lunatics,
for they always misunderstand.
- Swami Srikantananda
----------------------------------------------------
Patriotism - Why are you Proud of India? One of our reader says, I am proud of India because it loves and respects “Tulsi”, “Flue” and “Rudraksha” more than it wants sex, bomb or money!
----------------------------------------------------
Want to know Why I love my mom? When apples are 3 &we are 4 members in the house., Then mom says, I dont like apples!
----------------------------------------------------
Parents often talk about the younger generation as if they didn't have anything to do with it. - Haim Ginott
----------------------------------------------------
If you don't believe in ghosts, you've never been to a family reunion. - Ashleigh Brilliant
----------------------------------------------------
A father was trying to teach his young son the evils of alcohol. He put one worm in a glass of water and another worm in a glass of whiskey. The worm in the water lived, while the one in the whiskey curled up and died. “All right, son," asked the father, “What does that show you?" “Well, Dad, it shows that if you drink alcohol, you will not have worms."



BUBBA JOKE!

Bubba was bragging to his boss one day, “You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."

Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, “OK, Bubba how about Tom Cruise?"

“Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it." So Bubba and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise, shouts, “Bubba! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!"

Although impressed, Bubba's boss is still skeptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Bubba that he thinks Bubba's knowing Cruise was just lucky.

“No, no, just name anyone else," Bubba says.

“President Clinton," his boss quickly retorts.

“Yes," Bubba says, “I know him, let's fly out to Washington."

And off they go. At the White House, Clinton spots Bubba on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, “Bubba, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up." Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced.

After they leave the White house grounds, he expresses his doubts to Bubba, who again implores him to name anyone else.

“The Pope," his boss replies. “Sure!" says Bubba.

“My folks are from Poland, and I've known the Pope a long time."

So off they fly to Rome. Bubba and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when ----------------------------------------------------Remember these structures? These steel structures are at AIMS Crossing in Delhi. Symbolic representation joint of family system of our country.
----------------------------------------------------

Bubba says, “This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope." and he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican. Sure enough, half an hour later Bubba emerges with the Pope on the balcony. But by the time Bubba returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.

Working his way to his boss' side, Bubba asks him, “What happened?" His boss looks up and says, “I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said, “Who's that on the balcony with Bubba?"

I am a proud lawyer!

I am not that lawyer
to whom “Money is God”
I am but that lawyer
to whom “Truth is God”

I am not that lawyer
Whose learning is for earning
I am but that lawyer
Whose earning is for serving

I am not that lawyer
who always expects bribes
I am that lawyer
Whose heart melts seeing cries

A prayer by
Swami Srikantananda