I write to confess about my mistake. In families, sometime one parent tries to influence children in his favor and/or against the other and how this makes for unhappiness. I am glad I made amends before it was too late....

As I look back, I suppose it was not a mature thing to do. I had married and we had two children. As they grew up I became fond of them. I wanted them to love me, look up to me and make me the central person in their life. Children naturally love their mother and I did the unthinkable. I set my children against their mother. Little bits here and there; a word of poison and in time I found that my children gave me the importance I craved. I secretly exulted....

I had triumphed over my wife. I did not think at that time how petty it was. How my behavior went against the ideals of a family. I did not think of the hurt feelings of my wife. I was drunk and obsessed with my aim and achievement. Whenever we were together I was the most important man in the family. My wife was only there to serve. When we went out I and my children decided everything; my wife tagged along, subservient. Did it ever occur to me how joyful it would be if we all shared love? It did not.

But today, my children are in their late teens and ours is a happy family. They give their mother the love and respect she deserves. So how and when did this transformation take place in me? Five years ago when my brother and his family came to visit us and spend their vacation. I noticed that my brother and his wife always seemed close; loved and respected each other. Their children too loved both and when I saw them all sitting sharing the warmth of loving spaces of a family, something stirred inside me.

I had a chat with my brother and then, when I could, with my bhabhi. The gist of the talk was that right at the beginning when they started a family, they make a commitment to each other. “We would jointly bring up our children, teach them to love us and be loved and look upon us both as their parents. We have seen differences among parents can cause unhappiness among children...

Luckily for us, we worked at our plan and we are so happy.” I went away and reflected. The terrible thought that I had done it all wrong dawned on me. Was it too late to make amends? Would my wife forgive me? Would my children change?

Later, when I got the chance, I took my wife for a walk. I told her my feelings, confessed I had wronged her and asked her to forgive me. “I knew what you were doing all along. I kept my family, our family at the front and have accepted all you did and now you realize it, everything will be all right. Our family will be like your brother's.” That's all she said. I made a resolve. It took some doing to teach my children about family values and a mother's place. That they saw us united helped. I am glad I made amends before it was too late and even today, when the kids are grown up and have families of their own, our united love stands strong.

And I am glad I can get this off my chest...
Confession can sometime help!

May God bless our home.